Blue.

Just thinking about how hard it's going to be on this little guy (Coley) when his brother moves out on his own next year.

And it's making me kind of blue today.

I had Ross when I was young and quite honestly, I spend most of his childhood feeling stressed, worried and impatient.

I wish I had slowed down and appreciated it all a bit more.

That's making me kind of blue today too.

Comments

[Kim H.]

Feeling a little blue and melancholy myself today! I have two sons that are 8 years apart and it's going to hard on my little one when his big brother leaves too. I have 4 more years though, so thank you for the perspective of "slowing down and appreciating it all a bit more!" I love your posts!

[april]

I'm sorry. I imagine it will be hard for all of y'all...even Yannie. :) Hang in there and try to enjoy every moment between now and then.

[annie]

Feel better!

[Pam]

I have had regrets about the past but always remember that I did the best I could with the light that I had at the time. Enjoy the now, and be easy on yourself.

[sarah]

i agree with pam's comment above...enjoy the NOW and be a little easier on yourself. i was raised by a single mother...it's HARD work and i think you did a FABULOUS job!!

[Kimberly]

Well it is hard - on everyone, except the one moving out. We had a taste of it last summer our oldest is 8 yrs older than the brothers, then 10 and 12 yrs older than the sisters; worked 4 states away at a Bible camp for the summer. The one who had the hardest time with was our youngest; interestingly we didn't notice HOW much until, big sis came home. She's been home a year now, living here it's be glorious! It won't be long before she's getting married and really living on her own. And I spent much of her younger years as a single Momma, when God did bring Mr. Wonderful in to our lives, I was busy having babies; I too was stressed out for most of her raising. Thinking about how quickly she's grown and the others behind her does make me a little blue too. Happy blue day!

[Peggy]

I just love looking into Cole's eyes - they are so clear and pure and you get a glimpse of what he's going to look like when he's older. Oops - wait, sorry - that isn't congruent with this post. Sorry but I'm kind of glad you're blue. Awareness is powerful.

[Jennifer M.]

Everyone has already said it, but I'll say it as well: enjoy the now. Life moves by so quickly (as you well know) that you often miss the great stuff happening right now.

Still...the thought of my daughter leaving me kills me, and I've still got 5 years before that happens...

[Beth]

Honey enjoy now for all you can! You are a great Mom and shouldn't have any regrets, your kids are fabulous.

I've been feeling blue the last few weeks myself. My darling boy moved 12 hours away for University and I miss him so much. Our nest is empty and it really feels empty. I won't be able to hug my boy until Christmas, far too long! But I know it's an incredible opportunity for him and try to focus on that.

[Julia]

That's us 4 years from now. I am not planning on handling it well. He just got his driver's permit yesterday - I remember when I got my license! This is too weird.

[Ann]

Sorry that you are feeling so blue. I would make sure to talk openly with Coley about how Josh is becoming a grown man (not your little boy anymore). Okay I'll shut up now-here I am trying to give parenting advise to a perfectly great mom (okay-great moms have their days too but they recognize them and try to do better next time-as indicated by the "list" post). I just want to tell you how much I do enjoy your blog and pictures. How much photoshop do you do, honestly-esp the posts from Josh's birthday? Do you set a custom white balance every single time that you shoot? Your colors are always dead on. I am thinking that I need to take your class again!!
Thanks for sharing your life, and thoughts with us blog readers. Love you for that!

[Wendy Goodman]

The thought of my son leaving for college is more than I can bear. I have 14 more years to prepare, and I'm afraid it will be here before I know it. I can't imagine there is an easy way to cope, so I won't offer advice. But I do appreciate you expressing what all of us feel at some time or another. Thanks for being human!

[Katrina]

This happened to me this year. My son went off to school 2000 miles away not the easiest thing to swallow but it happens. My husband and I have what I call a menopause baby so their is 16 years between the two and we have a 17 year old still in high school. The phone is our best friend and we all talk to him once to twice a day. I too wished when he was younger I would of slowed down and enjoyed each moment. I was too busy trying to be the perfect Mom. The best part is we all appreciate each other so much more. We are flying out on Thursday to visit him for Family Weekend and all I can say is I will be cherishing every moment. Life moves way too fast ...but our jobs as Mom's is to make them great people who go out into this world to give, love and cherish others just as we have done to them. Your a wonderful Mom don't ever deny yourself of that!

[Jen Ely]

I agree w/ Sarah and Pam , Karen! From what I see you and Ross have a close relationship . It must not have been that bad. Give yourself a break. You could search the whole world over and you will never find a perfect parent. This adjustment will be hard enough. Let go of that Mommy guilt!! i pray that the Lord blesses you in a very special way today!!!

[alicia]

You know what, it's evident in the photos you share and in the bits you've told of your relationship with Ross that he loves you very much and the state of your being when he was little hasn't had a negative impact on how much you mean to each other today.

[Jen]

I'm sorry you're feeling blue Karen -- it's a perfectly natural thing and I know I'm going to feel exactly the same way when my oldest is about to take that step too. Thinking about the future can help you prepare for it too though. I'm sure when the time comes you won't feel ready, but you will be and so will Ross and Coley. You've spent all these years preparing them for adulthood and being a great mom, and that's not going to change. Maybe you and Coley could have another Ross Day and talk about some of it?

[Dina]

Sorry that you feel blue, Karen! I think you need a Ross Day!

[Melissa Mann]

Great picture! I'm sorry that you are having a blue day. I say, eat some chocolate ;-)

[tanyawebster]

wish i could hug you right now sweetie....i am sure that you ALL will miss him..he is one very awesome cool guy :) you did good little mama :)

[Kim P]

I'm sorry you're feeling blue. But we wouldn't cherish and appreciate all the good things in life w/o feeling that way sometimes. Just remember your "blue" feelings when Annie is repeating, "Mom, Mama, Mommy, Mooooomm" a thousand times in a day. We will miss the 3 year old days someday too (I'm typing this to tell myself...).

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift - that is why we call it the present.

-author unknown

Have a great day!

[janel]

Big hugs to you., It is pretty amazing that the time in years is a blur, yet sometimes during the moments of each day, they are agonizingly long and you wish them away. I understand, and since both of mine are out of the nest, I yearn for the days when maybe I wasn't as patient as I should have been and things seemed chaotic. Perspective is so unique. Thank goodness for photos to help us remember how very precious each second, minute, hour actually is.

[Shaun Paddock]

I am sorry that you are feeling the way you are. I must admit that I am happy to hear that I am not the only one feeling this way today and everyday lately.

[Kirsten]

I can soooo relate - just sent my oldest off to college last week. He's less than an hour away, but now I haven't seen him in 9 days and that's the longest we've ever been apart. I was surprised at how hard it has been on my 9 year old, so get ready. The first few days were the hardest, but luckily he's not an airplane trip away, so we should see him often. (I hope). You laid a good foundation, mama, don't be hard on yourself.

[Patty Hetrick]

I dread that day!! I have at least 8 more years but she's my only one so when she's out there are no more to enjoy. But it's okay because I'm still hoping we'll be the best of friends and the times we will get together will be all the more special!

[Brenda]

Karen - i had twins right after turning 20, so i cannot imagine having a kid even younger, but I do understand - i was so young, and so busy, stressed, cranky, that I dont remember many of the milestones from them as little ones. Now they are in highschool....

[JaYne]

You have mamasenioritis. I boohoo'd on all three of my boys senior years. Enjoy each day. It won't be long and we'll be reading about Annie's senior year. Don't Blink. I'm telling you. hug them hard and long every chance you get. Savor the moments. Every moment.

[K.B.]

Oh, I feel for you. My baby had a life-threatening car accident the end of her junior year in high school. It was so hard to move her to school. She left right after graduation, as she had a summer job 11 hours away from home. The cell is our best friend! Send Ross to USU and our kids could carpool part of the way. We are in Portland area! She is majoring in photography and would love, love to go on your trip next year!

[jamie]

But look at how good you did with him... he sounds like an awesome kid!

I hear ya though- I've got 7 or 8 years before I'm in your shoes and I'm dreading it already! (hugs)

[Kathleen Kraft]

Blue is okay on some days....just think of the crazy love (and craziness) you get from Annie and the others (including that sweet Coley!). Your relationship with Ross will change but in a good way. Hang in there!

[=^..^=]

DOn't feel too bad - it's normal to feel blue about it all. And you've been so blessed to have Ross with you until he leaves for college. My son - who just turned 18 this summer, will be leaving for the USMC in two weeks...and he decided in July that he wanted to spend his last few months of "freedom" living with his GIRLFRIEND (YUK) and her parents. So much for being an appreciative child, huh ! So now we barely hear from him - twice in the last 9 weeks - and in 13 short days, he'll be gone.

So count your blessings with Ross - things could be much different.

[Shalini]

I agree, you need a Ross Day and we need to see pictures of it...
I have a quick question about lens for you, I am considering buying a Tokina AF 8-200 F2.8 E, what's your opinion, my main reason for considering this lens is the 2.8F and of course its so much more affordable that the Nikon counterpart. Please let me know your thoughts, Thank you!

[Missy]

From the blog, it looks like you have raised a very well rounded young man. Based on the blog he seems to be happy and have a good relationship with his family. I think you deserve a pat on the back!

[Brianna]

(((Hugs)))

[Christy]

I had twins when I was 17. Made LOTS of mistakes and my heart breaks sometimes when I think of some of the things I did and didn't do.

I've decided that in heaven God is going to show me how he used my ugly moments to make my kids stronger, better people and that they wouldn't be the same if I had been perfect.

[Diann]

I so totally understand. My youngest (of four) left for college this fall. My oldest, twins, were 7 when he was born. The time has flown so fast and furious since then that I sometimes feel that I must have missed an awful lot of it. I always say I would go back to when my kids were little and do it all over if I could. If only I knew when they were little that things would turn out all right it would have been a lot easier! All the stress and anxiety...The truest thing about parenting is this: Long days, short years.

[domenico' mum]

maybe he'll visit on laundry day.

[domenico]

HEY! Who added mum to my name?

[domenico]

You never know, he might visit on laundry day.

[Cheryl Balara]

I hope you are feeling better today.

I must say this picture is Gorgeous! The sharpness, the pops of color and I always love your perspective. Can you share your camera settings for this shot?