I know they're a lovely crew, but sometimes (Once a month like clockwork.) I forget how blessed I am and decide I want to run away from home.
So yesterday, as I drove aimlessly around Medford, Oregon, trying to decide where I should run away to while crying and feeling shamelessly sorry for myself, I heard the honk of another car slowly passing by.
It was a friend of mine.
Turns out she was driving aimlessly around Medford, Oregon as well, trying to kill time because she didn't want to go home either.
She said she had just the cure for me and drove me to Mellelo's for an iced, single-shot, decaf Mexican Mocha. She talked, she listened and she shared her own mothering struggles with me (which really, aren't all that different than my own.)
And then she pulled up next to my car and reminded me of why I had to go home.
So I sat in my car with my head pressed hard up aginst my steering wheel for a few minutes and then I put my key in the ignition and drove home.
Where I belong.
I'm glad someone found you and you had someone to talk to. I'm the opposite I don't want to run away, I wish they'd all leave home sometimes.
Posted by: Kelli | February 28, 2011 at 07:50 AM
I've been having this feeling lately also! Sometimes it just all becomes too much!!! Everyone says to take time for yourself, but how do you find the time to take for yourself?
Hope you are feeling better!!!
Posted by: Shannon Jones | February 28, 2011 at 08:16 AM
Thank you for expressing and sharing what all Mother's feel from time to time. I saw this quote on the Oscars last night and really liked it: “It is not the load that breaks you down; it's the way you carry it. Lena Horne"
Posted by: Dawn Wheeler (Go Beavs) | February 28, 2011 at 08:22 AM
It's great that you can share this!! I think we all (mothers) feel this way more than we care to acknowledge. It's nice to be reassured that we are not alone in these feelings. I hope today is better for you...and all of us!!!
BTW, Courtney Lee is getting more and more beautiful with each post!!!
Posted by: Beth P. | February 28, 2011 at 08:28 AM
Thank you, Karen for another honest post!! Makes me feel less guilty, because I know about these days, too. Luckily these feelings don't last long.
Posted by: Anne | February 28, 2011 at 08:29 AM
I think its very brave of you to talk about those feelings. I think we all as mothers have those moments, but we are afraid that if we say it out loud it somehow makes us lesser of a mother or woman. However if we all spoke up more about it we can all help each other. Being a mom is a hard job, especially when you are juggling other balls in the air. It should always be okay to say, "today i just can't do this." I hope your tomorrow finds you feeling better!
Posted by: cait | February 28, 2011 at 09:13 AM
Been there....done that!!! I think every mom has... I have on more than one occasion gone and locked myself into the bathroom also. Just remember "this too, shall pass!"
Hang in there!!!
~S~
Posted by: Stacey H | February 28, 2011 at 10:12 AM
Yes..that darn clockwork thing is a pain and I think we all feel that way or as Kelli feels...for everyone else to leave. You're not alone...but let me tell you it all goes by too fast and then like me you look back and really want that time back. Some days I would give anything to have those days back but then I think what the #@!! are you thinking...lol I'm really just kidding. I would take it back..but when you have that kind of crappy day..make it a me day and do something you like to do. Hang in there!! Big hugs!!
Posted by: Tracy | February 28, 2011 at 10:13 AM
You are not alone! We sacrifice so much of ourselves and we never seem to realize that we need our own "down" time. So don't feel bad about running away...as long as you come back. I wonder if this is related to the fact that we work from home so we don't get out as much as the others in our household.
I've been having more emotional moments in the past year because I'm not scrapping or photographing as much as I'd like. But I have a goal in mind and I think it's getting closer:)
Posted by: Patty H | February 28, 2011 at 10:22 AM
LOVE it!! Glad to know I'm not alone. So glad you found a friend that was doing the same thing as you, on the same day, at the same time. What a blessing.
Posted by: Jen S | February 28, 2011 at 10:34 AM
Karen, I'm totally with you on this one. Thank you so much for putting your true feelings out there, it makes lots of us feel "normal"!! My kids have just had a week off school and I had the guilt this morning of feeling happy that they were going to be at school instead of in the house going crazy and driving me crazy too. I'm having a day off on Saturday with a friend shopping and I'm hoping to be a more refreshed mama when I get back. Keep strong :)
Posted by: Julie Pilch | February 28, 2011 at 10:48 AM
I love that your stories are so real. Nothing fake, nothing sugar coated, but with love... all in one. Thank you for sharing your hopes, dreams, loves, and struggles. :)
Posted by: Cori S | February 28, 2011 at 11:01 AM
I so appreciate you taking the time to share times like this. I have left home several times having decided I'm an inadequate parent but I always come back to where I belong. probably wont stop me leaving againthough
Chris x
Posted by: Chris | February 28, 2011 at 11:06 AM
So glad you found a friend yesterday to hang out with for a while. Seems like we all have days like this. Hope you're feeling better.
Posted by: Diane W. | February 28, 2011 at 11:13 AM
I went and got my hair trimmed the other day (it's been 7 or 8 months) and my stylist, who I went to school with and have known forever asked me what I've been doing lately. I responded with 'going through the motions'. There is joy in parenting, don't get me wrong. And I wouldn't trade my job for anyone else'. I TRULY mean that. But many days it does feel like I'm going through the motions. Glad you had an opportunity to spend a few moments with a friend and talk <3
Posted by: Tammy Mellish | February 28, 2011 at 11:24 AM
I feel that way myself sometimes.
Posted by: Nicky H | February 28, 2011 at 12:01 PM
I so enjoy your honesty. You are definitely not alone in your desire to run away. That feeling hits me every so often too, and then my little boy will give me a hug, kiss and tell me he loves me, for no reason at all. It makes it all worth it. I think we all need to recharge our batteries once in a while, take a break, and be a real person outside of our duties at home. :)
Posted by: Wendy Goodman | February 28, 2011 at 12:01 PM
beautiful kids!
I wish I could just get away and go for a drive somedays!
that would be enough for me!
hugs!
tara
Posted by: tara pollard pakosta | February 28, 2011 at 01:24 PM
oh karen... how i needed to hear that... next time you are in albany looking at the antique shops you might see me sitting with my head on the steering wheel... thank you!
Posted by: kate | February 28, 2011 at 01:52 PM
I just want to say I know how you feel....us Mom's are entitled to our little moments like this...and then it is all ok in the world...
Happy day
kim
Posted by: Kim Bolyard | February 28, 2011 at 01:52 PM
Just stopping by to say I miss your posts, but understand you are probably super swamped. (Reading your blog is a get-away for me.) Praying for patience, and laughter in your house!
Posted by: Tera | February 28, 2011 at 01:56 PM
Cannot live without family or friends....both fulfill such a need. It must have been a "God" thing that you ran into each other....the days can be so long, but the years are gone in an instant. Hang in there!
Posted by: janel | February 28, 2011 at 02:53 PM
Sounds like God sent you an angel just when you needed one. Aren't His simple graces amazing? They keep me going for sure.
Posted by: Deanna | February 28, 2011 at 03:28 PM
I totally had that day yesterday. I haven't had a bawling auditory cry in a while. I'm still not over it, but life goes on... Hugs!
Posted by: Laura Evangeline | February 28, 2011 at 04:55 PM
I'm so glad I'm not the only person who feels like running away!!!
Posted by: Angela | February 28, 2011 at 05:33 PM